One thing

One of the things that I am glad about myself, is how I have the ability to not let anything cloud my mind. When I say anything, I really do mean anything. Anything from the lost of friend, to death, to anything heart rending. I can't say I am perfect in suppressing them all, but i'm better than most people though it does no good to me when i'm in my own solitude.

Take for example having to walk pass a particular place where unpleasantries occured.
I walk pass it, unwanted flashes of memories comes and I feel it in my bones, in every ounce of me and then the next minute, it's like being in anesthesia. I don't feel what I felt. It's like repressing thoughts down and waiting for the night to let it all spill.
But, most of the time I just forget that I have the ability to cast away what I don't want. It's just not as memorized as ABC or 123. But it's perfectly fine. I mean once I get distracted and stop thinking about the unwanted, i'll start to realise my ability and there, off it disappears like it never was there at all.

So I guess thats one of the factors which makes me seem dehumanized in people's eye - Those that are tricked, of course. I don't know if this is one good factor to most or not but it sure does good to me at some point of needs.