In her book

While awake at 12 in the afternoon today. I found a paragraph of words I wrote at 3 in the morning that were strung together. I know because I have a habit of writing the time and date of entries that I write. I took the time to recall the state of emotions I was in and finally deciphered what the words were and what happened.

"Like an endless cyclical nature that I cannot disregard,

You cannot offer me escape and I cannot offer qualities of the sun. So what now, you ask. So leave while I stay stagnant while the world moves forward without me. No one slows down for another. I can't face the days straight without staggering. I cannot keep up either so keep me.. So keep me when I am somber and detached. So tell me I am beautiful. So keep me and will my weak self in to your heart while I am treading surfaces of water. So give concern and feed me my medication daily. So be insistent and give me a place in you to stay. So stay.... But you won't. Getting down on my knees.. So stay, I say, but no one hears."