Blasé

When I recall the comments that many others make of me, I realise they never fail to mention how indifferent I was to just about everything. Questions like, "what's wrong?" "What are you thinking?" "Aren't you upset/angry/annoyed at this matter"? all coming up continuously. Soon, they just take me as I am and accept that I haven't got much to show. It's quite funny thinking about how others view me. It's fascinating beecause I know how much of a opposite I am on the inside.

Being indifferent makes people detest you out of their frustrations in figuring out what truly goes on in your head. You're always so unfeeling, so untouchable on the outside. Whereas for them, they're always going on about something which honestly is so trival, getting upset over something so insignificant (like the weather being rainy or that the queue was far too long a wait). Talking about people, matters and throwing about words that wouldn't even help change a thing for the better. It is nothing but a waste of energy. At least to me that's how I view things.

Being so indifferent however, is something I want to keep with me. What point is there to explain. It makes no difference in a world full of narcissists. I don't believe my words, needs, feelings would hold any weight in the hands of others. Think about this positively, it keeps disappointments at bay. Relations around you that you have seemingly "cultivated" will have no conflicts. You cater to their needs. Plain, simple. I'd rather keep everything of me safe in this space where I can speak freely.  It's all i've got left.

There we have it, people around the world mastering a subject, the stock market or baking skills and here I am, mastering the art of always seeming indifferent. I've put things into perspective for you haven't I? Guess it sounds pretty damn unpleasant.